Funny shell

Some simply funny linux commands follow (sourced from here):

% cat “food in cans”
cat: can’t open food in cans

% nice man woman
No manual entry for woman.

% “How would you rate Quayle’s incompetence?
Unmatched “.

% Unmatched “.
Unmatched “.

% [Where is Jimmy Hoffa?
Missing ].

% ^How did the sex change operation go?^
Modifier failed.

% If I had a ( for every $ the Congress spent, what would I have?
Too many (‘s.

% make love
Make: Don’t know how to make love. Stop.

% sleep with me
bad character

% got a light?
No match.

% man: why did you get a divorce?
man:: Too many arguments.

% !:say, what is saccharine?
Bad substitute.

% %blow
%blow: No such job.

% \(-
(-: Command not found.

$ PATH=pretending! /usr/ucb/which sense
no sense in pretending!

$ drink matter
matter: cannot create


One response to “Funny shell

  1. that was really funny 🙂

    most of them do not work on BASH, some of them do. From your prompt I can guess, you have used ZSH (but that’s a guess only as you can create that prompt in BASH too) . look here at my BASH:

    [arnuld@Arch64 ~]$ nice man woman
    No manual entry for woman

    [arnuld@Arch64 ~]$ cat “food in cans”
    cat: food in cans: No such file or directory

    [arnuld@Arch64 ~]$ [Where is Jimmy Hoffa?
    -bash: [Where: command not found

    [arnuld@Arch64 ~]$ sleep with me
    sleep: invalid time interval `with’
    sleep: invalid time interval `me’
    Try `sleep –help’ for more information.

    [arnuld@Arch64 ~]$ make love
    make: *** No rule to make target `love’. Stop.

    [arnuld@Arch64 ~]$ \(-
    -bash: (-: command not found